kirsty UNSCRIPTED.

i got my classes picked out. which is exciting. mondays i have wheelthrowing from 9-1150. then i have 3D design from 12 - 250. tuesday nights i have ethics from 7-950, and wednesdays i have intro to art history 2 from 7-950. then im taking an online class for my teaching stuff. i just keep getting better and better at getting my classes. it would be nice if my ethics and art history were on the same day, one before the other, buttttt colter and jess are taking them too. so were going to be car pooling. and jess is taking wheelthrowing and 3D with me too. :] itll be fun. and me and her will be carpooling on mondays. im really excited for this semester. all of my classes make me happy. minus the teaching one, since its online and ive never done an online class before. eekkkk! :[

me and colter started this new work out called p90x. its a 90 day workout, and you workout 7 days a week. its cool, i like it. except, i made the mistake of stepping on the scale almost a week ago, and because ive been working out, im getting more muscle, and i jumped up like ten pounds. :[ but colter says that i should start losing weight soon, which is good. were only in week three, and every fouth week is your recovery week, so its not as intense as the regular weekly workout, which is:
monday - back and chest.
tuesday - plyometrics.
wednesday - arms and shoulders.
thursday - yoga.
friday - legs and back.
saturday - kenpo.
sunday - stretching.

its all getting easier now that im getting used to it, but it still wears me out lol. in two weeks me and colter are going up to st augustine to visit my sister. and to also visit flagler college and unf. im pretty excited. then on the way back were stopping in orlando and going to universal/islands of adventure for the day. :] im really excited to see how far they are on the harry potter part of islands. :DDDDD ohboyohboyohboy!

problems resolved.

so yesterday was just a pretty bad night at work. and to top it off, some whore came in wearing a shirt that was about 3 times too small for her, and she obviously had implants so her boobs were just about hanging all the way out of it. so colter was staring at her. like, not just a glance, but like STARING. so i was pissed. like, way to make your girlfriend feel like shes not even good enough. so i was naturally pissed because of that. but other things happened at work last night that im not going to go into detail about. so i ended up confronting him about it after work, and he tried denying it but he was smiling so obviously he was lying. which made me really mad. so then i ended up having a dream that we were in some hotel with my parents, and there was this other girl. i dont know who she was but she wouldnt leave colter alone. so hes like "im going to go talk to her, ill be right back." and this was like right before we were going to go to sleep. well needless to say he never came back to the room. so i went out looking for him and he ended up leaving me not for the girl that he was going to talk to, but some other girl! so me and the first girl were like "wtf is his problem?!" and i woke up feeling like shit. like my whole body was aching and it was just so upsetting. i dont know what i would do if i ever lost him, but i was just a total wreck all morning, ive been just moping around and i hadnt talked to colter until maybe, ten minutes ago? mainly because he didnt call me, but he told me that he was going to be working on his car all day so i didnt really think twice about it. but amanda ended up calling me to see where he was at because she needed him to work tonight and she hadnt been able to get ahold of him all morning. so i said i hadnt heard from him but if i did i would have him call her. so i tried calling, numerous times. no answer. so i called his house and his brother finally answered saying that he hadnt talked to him all day but he thinks he was out with michael and to try his cell phone. so i tried. again. no answer. so i left a message.  then he finally calls back, and im like amanda has been trying to get ahold of you, she needs you to go in for her tonight because she spent the night in the hospital last night, blah blah blah. and hes like oh well ive been out on the boat all morning and i was like excuse me? you didnt tell me this. you told me that you were going to be working on your car all day today. and hes all no i didnt. but he never told me that he was going fishing. because if he did i would of asked if i could of gone. i am so beyond furious right now. i really hope that he wont work tonight so i dont have to see his fucking face. hes lied to me twice in less than 24 hours. its tearing me up inside.

i hate waking up after a really bad dream, because your body thinks that it was real. and now, im in this really bad mood because of it. im really upset.

so dad went to the hospital a couple weeks ago. he was having bad pains in his stomach. it started on a friday night and apparently hes had them before so the doctor told him to wait til monday to come see him. to make a long story short he ended up in the hospital, hes appendix burst and he could of died because he waited like his doctor told him to. after like 24 hours of your appendix bursting all the feces leak into your insides and it could be very deadly. luckily enough hes okay now. hes been out of the hospital for a week or two. he just finished his antibiotics yesterday. it was really scary. my dad woke me up on that monday and was like i need you to take me to the hospital. so i did. and we spent all day there. he got surgery and got it all removed. buts its all good now. hes okay.

prom was last weekend. it was fun. kind of reminded me how much i hated highschool. lol. i got my grades from this semester finally!
speech- A
painting- A
pysch- B
western civ- B!!!!
oceano- B!!!!

i was really scared about the last two. which is why im so excited that i got b's in them. lol. in oceano i had a 79.97 and i was going to be really pissed if he didnt round it up. but he did. :] win. and i didnt do well on any of my western civ tests really so im really excited that i got a b overall. :]]]]


i dont want to go to work tonight.

okay, so apparently jamie didnt want colter to actually be assistant manager, she jus wanted to know what he would say so she could have a backup plan IF anything happened. but still, she didnt talk to me. therefore, i suck.

so colter went and bought me another necklace, since my other one broke and i lost the charm. he couldnt get the other chain fixed because no warrenty, so he bought me a new one, since the one that comes with it looks really flimsy and we didnt want to take that chance in the first place and we still dont want to do that again. it was incredibly sweet of him but i really feel horrible that he wasted his money like that. :[

i only have like three weeks of school left. i havent started my westciv paper, or project, and i havent finished my speech, nor have i finished the extra credit for psych. i got one paper done, but i have to write to more to get all 30 points. :[

another thing to add to the list :

colter just got offered the assitant manager job at dairy queen.
i got offered nothing.



shows how hard ive worked my ass off for nothing.
i still fucking suck.

so i know i say this a lot, but nothings really been going on. ive been working, and going to school. and studying inbetween. it sucks. i work just about 40 hour weeks, and go to school full time. and i dont get to see colter unless he comes over after work. i told jamie that i needed less hours now that school is coming to an end, since i have a lot of essays and speeches and projects that need to be done. and finals are coming up and if i dont pass these classes im more apt to get dropped by bright futures. its just too muc stress. so this week jamie gave me three days, but i pulled a double on saturday, worked sunday morning, and then i work friday night too. its been good. i feel like ive gotten a lot done. and me and colter actually have two days off this week. its a mircle. lol. but when i stopped in dq tonight dani said something about me needing less hours and how jamie had told her. for one, its none of her fucking business if i need less hours, and for two, i bet jamie was talking shit to dani about it. its just not fair. i hate dairy queen. hate it hate it hate it.


but in other news, since me and colter had yesterday night off, we went up to tampa to MOSI to see the body worlds exhibit. its where they disect all the human bodys and put them in different positions to show how different things worked and so on and so forth. it was really cool. they also had a disected camel. that was neat. then this morning since colter is on spring break we went up to charlotte high to go see mrs abell so i could show her the stuff ive been working on in my art classes. it was good to see her. :] i miss her sooo much! and mrs taylor too! but after that we went over to port charlotte beach or whatever and went fishing. didnt catch anything except for some snails and a puffer fish. but my necklace broke and the charm that colter just got me for our anniversary fell into the water and now its gone. :[ im really upset.  but other than that it was an alright time. there were some rude comments that were supposed to be jokes said about me and that kinda aggitated me. needless to say me and colter arent really on good terms right now i guess? we were going to go get something to eat after fishing, but colter wouldnt decided where to go so hes like "you just want to go home?" and i said "fine." so i thought he was taking me home, which was alright with me. but when he turned down sandhill to go to his house i asked him where we were going and he saiid that when he had said home he meant his house. so i was like whatever. so when we walk inside he goes to the kitchen to wash his hands and i went to the bathroom to pee and wash up and when i walk out his making himself food in the kitchen. so i stood off to the side and he didnt even acknolegde the fact that i was there so i went and sat on the couch that you can see from the kitchen and you can see into the kitchen from it. so i just sat there, played some games on my phone, and then he brings this sandwich over to me without asking me if i even wanted one and so i said no thanks. i dont like eating at peoples houses, i dont know why i just dont. justl ike i dont like taking money from people for baby sitting or anything if i know them really well. i just dont like it. so i told him no thanks and he throws it on the kitchen table and goes and makes another one for himself. then after that he leaves me there and goes to take a shower, get ready for work, whatever. so i just sat there, continuing my games. then after he was done with that stuff he goes into his room and just stays in there for a while. and im still on the couch, playing my games, and finally he comes out and goes "you dont want to come lay down with me?" and i just looked at him and shrugged. what am i supposed to say to that? 'no thanks, im good laying by myself.' yeah right, i would of been kicked out of the house. so i just shrugged, (the sandwich was still sitting on the table.) soooooo i got up and walked into his room and sat on the corner of his bed, still playing my games. and i sat there, for almost an hour while he layed on the other side of the bed. then finally he gets me to lay next to him and then he goes and gets up and walks out of the room. oh okay, thanks. then he changes, in the bathroom, when he'll normally just change infront of me in his room. then he just stands there after hes done getting ready and says "are you coming with me?" oh no, im just going to lay on your bed all night while your at work, i wont go to school or anything. so i said, "oh your ready now?" really sarcastically. the whole way to my house we were completely silent. when i got out of the car and got my stuff from his trunk, silent. opening the garage door, going into the house, putting my stuff down, silent. sooo i go to say goodbye and im like , "okay, bye" and hes like "bye love you." and i was like "love you too." and then i closed the door without closing the garage door, and when i realized i did this i opened up the door to hit the button to close the garage door and i hear him like pretty much flooring it out of my drive way. so i slammed the door really hard. i was no very happy.

the whole time i just felt left out. i dont really fit in with his family, and they always make me feel really stupid like i dont belong and its not like colter defends me or anything. i was joking around and i picked up one of the shirmps they were using as bait and held it up next to my face and said we looked a like because he had big black eyes and i had on my big black sunglasses on. and michael(who is colters moms boyfriend) just kinda looks at me. so colter goes "its okay, she has a tumor. she'll be okay." and everyone started laughing. colter, tyler, melissa and michael. even though it was supposed to be a joke, it hurt. a lot. its just so hard not feeling like you fit in, and then when you try to joke around with them, it just gets thrown back in your face by your own fucking boyfriend.


then i stopped into dq tonight, and right when i walked in colter finished helping these few people then walked into the back of the store leaving dani up there by herself. she said it was because he had to 'clean the walk in' but i dont think that was really it. i have been freaking out lately that hes been cheating on me or something. it just doesnt feel right. and im so fucking scared. and when stuff like this happens, he makes me more nervous. and on top of it all, when the necklace broke, he didnt even care. he didnt freak out or anything. he just spent how much on that? and he just kinda shrugged it off. i just dont get it.

spring break is finally here. i couldnt be happier. and even more exciting, tomorrow, which is saturday, is the first day that ive had off of school AND work in the same day. i have the day to myself. its the most exciting thing since, rainbow sprinkles. and even even more exciting is the fact that i made 71 dollars in tips this week. thats the most ive gotten since ive worked at dq. my other all time high was like 64. i love getting a ton of tips. :]

so life has been pretty stressful lately. i got my period two weeks earlier than i was supposed to, and right now im supposed to have it, but theres nothing there. im really confused, im guessing it was because i was so stressed out, but im really not sure. and im a bit worried on top of it too.

tuesday is fat tuesday. awesome. i have to give something up. itll probably be fast food. or soda. or both. thatd be good. im really mad because ive been working out on the wiifit for almost a month now, and i havent really even lost any weight. colters lost like 15 pounds. im really pissed. its not fair that guys lose weight faster and easier than girls do. its just not fair.

so i dont know if i mentioned this earlier, but for colter and my anniversary, he made this picture frame collage thing and its really cute. it has old movie stubs, and reciepts and ticket stubs from concerts and howloscream and what not. it definitely made me cry. he gave it to me early because he had said that he had a surprise for me. well i hate surprises. soooo, this whole thing went down, i got mad because we decided that we werent really doing anything for our anniversary. well needless to say he got upset, ended up giving it to me the next day, i felt horrible! but its so cute. :] and on top it of it all, he gave me the new redjumpsuit cd, madagascar two, AND this necklace that i saw in jcpenneys a week ago when me and my mom were looking around. i told him about it because I WANTED TO TREAT MYSELF TO IT because i fell in love with it, but he went behind my back and got it for me. which is really precious but he obviously DIDNT NEED TO DO IT. but i absolutely love it. :]


BUTBUTBUTBUT, I STILL HAVENT GOTTEN HIM ANYTHING. i have til monday. my mom found some valentines day boxers that she gave to me to give to him, their a double xl, and im like, omg theyre not going to fit him. so ill probably just end up keeping them and wearing them to bed. im so freaking out right now though. i dont know what to get him! im really stessing.

matt and jenny are in from colorado. they came in on thursday, we went to tampa to pick them up then went out for pizza for my grandmas birthday at her favorite pizza place. :] it was nice. then on friday i worked then we had dinner then went out to visani's, which is the comedy place by our house. it was funny. they had this bigger guy on there and he was pretty hilarious. then they had this lady and her name was 'just june', she was a little old black lady, FUCKING HILARIOUS. i pretty much want her to be my best friend because she was so awesome. then after that me colter matt and jen went bowling. I FINALLY WON A FREE GAME AFTER GETTING A STRIKE.  i was so happy. by that point matt and jen were drinking throughout the whole night, and jenny was pretty much gone. the bowling ball got stuck in the lane somehow, so she threw another ball down there to move it, then they both got stuck, so she went to go get yet another ball to try to bowl them out of the way. thennnnn one of the workers came and moved the balls. then jenny went to go bowl and the little pin clearer was still down and she hit it. THENNN our time was up. we pretty much ran out before they could actually kick us out. :] then we went to dennys. that was fun. i got really sick though. :[ that was not fun.

today, we went and rented jet ski's. that was fun. :] now tonight mama is making her homemade pizza. :] soooooo delicious.



but i still dont know what to get colter for our anniversary/valentines day. im fucked.

sometimes i wish that i only had to go to college and not school maybe then i wouldnt be failing my oceanography or western civilizations classes. :[

also after colter left today i went and met up with my mom to pick out some new glasses. :] i found some. their pretty similar to my old ones. theyre cute. but until i get them i have taped my old glasses so i can at least wear them until i go to bed at night so im not squinting trying to see everything. but seriously, i look like the ultimate nerd with the black frame glasses taped on the nose piece. what what. :] haha. we also went shopping for some jeans and i found none. go figure. but i found this cute shirt. :] then we went out to chilis. it was delicious ofcourse. then we came home, i waited for colter to get off, and then we hung out for the half an hour he was allowed to stay, and now im here. i dont want to go to school in the morning. save me. :[

so this morning colter called and woke me up at 939am. :[ i wouldnt of been as upset as i was but i had seriously just falled back asleep when he called. so naturally i was grumpy. and i dont really blame him for calling anyway because he didnt have school this morning so he wanted to spend time together since we dont have any days off together this week. so i got over it. he came over around 1130. :] we were going to shower and stuff and get ready and go shopping, but we ended up just showering and laying around and what not (;]) all day. it was really nice. im not going to lie, for the past couple months whenever we have sex its normally like a quickie inbetween school and work. which that normally means about a half an hour tops to do it, get ready for work, and then leave. it was just so nice to actually have time and not having to worry about jumping up as soon as its over, throwing work cloths on, fix my hair, and run out the door. the whole day was completely sexual, but really relaxing at the same time. like he came over, and we took a shower together. then after that we just laid down on my bed, cuddled for a while, then we started getting into it, then after that we just laid in my bed for a while. and the sun was shining, the windows were open, it was such an awesome day out, it just really topped it all off. then we went and got subway, came back, ate, and then just cuddled on the couch until he had to go to work. like this probably doesnt even come close to explaining the whole day. it was just like falling in love with him all over again. it was so amazing.

this morning, i broke my glasses. i was taking off my hoodie and they got caught in the mist of it and just snapped right through the nose piece. :[ im hoping tomorrow i can go to the eye doctor and get some new ones and my insurance will cover it since ive had them for over two years and im up for new ones. i was really disappointed. i really liked those. :[ and that was pretty much the start to my bad day. :[[[[

so i start psych in an hour and a half. i dont know what the hell i was thinking by taking an 8am course on a campus that i live an hour away from. :[ and i have classes til 2. im going to die. but brd is in two of those classes so im down with it. :]

i really need to go to booksamillion and get a book on dreams.

If there are one or more people on your friends list who make your world a better place, just because they exist, & who you would not have met (in real life or not) without the Internet, then post this same sentence in your journal.




so, i just woke up. and i had a bad dream. which is pretty much why i woke up. it all started out that me and my family were on vacation somewhere where there was a beach, but it wasnt here. it might of been like key west or something but other than that i dont think it was florida. anyway, colter was with us and thats about it for that part of the dream. then all of a sudden we were packing, and jen(who was one of my friends in my art class last semester, shes seriously like an older me with three kids and no husband.) with her kids, but they didnt look anything like they did inthe pictures she showed me in class. but whatever. me and her kids were playing, because they are obviously really young still. and then next thing i know, me, jen, and her kids are all in chicago. i dont remember for what, but we were. and were just going around the city, going up in some of the buildings and were all taking pictures and then jen didnt look like herself anymore. she was completely different, but the kids were the same. and it was still jen. it was weird. so one of her kids ran off into a building to go to the top of it and look at the view so we all chased after him, and we split up to go seperate ways to find him. so i started running up these stairs and i got this really bad feeling inside me. and as im running i have to cut across the building to get up the rest of the stairs and theres a bunch of chairs there. and there was a ton of people sitting on them. and this one guy that stood out the most to me was making out with this girl, and at first i thought i knew him, like he was someone really close to me and with him doing stuff with the girl, i felt that it was affecting me. but then his features changed right infront of my eyes and i didnt recongnize him anymore. so i kept running to get to the stairs and when i finally get to them and i start  running up them i see brennan(who is my boss's son at work. he doesnt have very good luck with girls.) and this girl making out. and he jumps up like he was guilty of something. and i was like what the hell? so i kept running and i get to these doors so i go through them and im in a gym during a basketball game. which was weird because i was in a skyscraper. so these two players are standing right there and i was freaking out and i told them that i was looking for someone. and they were like "we havent seen anyone." and i was like "shes like my height, really skinny, with longer dark brown/black hair." i was describing tyler(colters brother)'s girlfriend. and i dont know why because i wasnt looking for her to begin with. then jen and everyone catches up with me in the gym and she starts screaming at this one kid on the bleachers to get up and to pull out the bleachers because she knows her son is under there. which at that point she switched to colters mom without me really noticing at first and i was thinking what the hell, ty and melissa are under there? and i figured they were probably doing it. so somehow the bleachers were opened and this girl pops up, and it wasnt melissa and i was like oh my god. hes cheating on her. and then i see the second person start to pop up, and it was colter. and he just looks around and then makes eye contact with me and just starts saying how sorry he was over and over again. so im standing there freaking out and he comes over to me and hes standing with his back to the stairwell and im screaming at him and trying to like hit him as hard as i can in the dream but it was making like no impact at all and i felt so weak. and i was like trying to shove him down the stair case but it would go anywhere. and then i woke up. :[ i was shaking so bad when i woke up and my heart was racing. it was so horrible. and the worst part about it is that colter was the only one that really looked like himself in the whole dream. everyone looked different and they kept changing. colters face was like exactly the same, he was even wearing clothes that he wears all the time. it was creepy.

tropic thunder was one of the dumbest movies ive ever seen. and it was VERY gorry. :[